The Battle of Wits - Conquering Difficult People and Self Improvement

in Self-improvement

Let's face reality, in life and in business, you will have occasion to come across and become engaged with difficult people. They are everywhere and avoiding them all together is simply not possible. Some of us even live with those kinds of people but let's leave my wife out of this. Just kidding honey.

An argument between two people often times turns into anger and can escalate, sending one or both parties into an uncontrollable rage. Nobody is the winner in a situation like this. What is really happening between these two people is a battle of wits. I know because I've been there before and what makes me the angriest is that I let somebody who was just trying to be difficult bait me into becoming someone I'm not. Very unprofessional.

The key to conquering a difficult person who tends to bring out your angry side is to not engage them in this battle of wits. Take the high road, as difficult as that might sound at the time, in retrospect, you will be glad you did. If you try to fight fire with fire, you will get burned.

Keep in mind while you are attempting to overcome difficult people, you can never negotiate with excellence. As you get closer and closer to achieving the goals you have set for yourself and your business, you must understand that time spent arguing and engaging these difficult people moves you away, not closer to your goals.

In my experience, try and use reason and logic when battling with difficult, uncooperative people. If this fails to produce the results you are looking for, you should resign yourself to the notion that unreasonable people are not worth your time or your effort. If you are in this situation, stop talking and just listen to what they have to say. Agree were it is prudent and acceptable to agree and shut up where applicable. If this fails, walk away and save yourself the heartache and pain.

I have a couple of friends who are what I would classify as those difficult people that you come across from time to time. Most of the time we agree and on those occasions that we don't, I just shut up and nod my head up and down.

I like these people as friends so if I spend every moment I'm around them giving into their irrational thoughts while arguing with them in an attempt to apply logic to their illogical way of thinking, we could no longer be friends. Seems senseless to me so again, I just shut up and agree to disagree.

When dealing with these kinds of people, it is important to have an understating of the problem and the person behind the problem. Some people have issues that make reason and logic impossible to comprehend. Literally, some people have genuine medical disorders that act as a barrier in this regard. I'm don't profess to say that everybody who is difficult to deal with will have a medical excuse, but keep in mind that many do.

I have a friend that could produce a doctor's excuse during an argument that would explain their irrational behavior in the midst of overwhelming proof that contradicts their position. He is a great guy but engaging in a debate with this person is a futile effort. Doing so is of benefit to no one except for the outsider who likes to witness a good fight.

Nothing you can say or do will overcome this. Again, walking away where appropriate to do so is the answer.

Remember, somebody who you are engaged in a battle of wits with, somebody who is arguing, annoying, irrational and just plain pushy will only drag you down with them if you allow them to do so. Do not let this happen to you. Keep your eye on the big picture, your goals. Avoid allowing the difficult people you come across in life to reflect them selves on you. You do this and you will always come out ahead.

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Dennis Gill has 1 articles online

Dennis Gill is a successful business coach and mentor and can be contacted via his web site http://www.dennisgillonline.com or http://www.dartboardcabinetsplus.com

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The Battle of Wits - Conquering Difficult People and Self Improvement

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This article was published on 2010/04/03